Beowulf PDF â Paperback

Beowulf is a major epic of Anglo Saxon literature probably composed between the first half of the seventh century and the end of the first millennium The poem was inspired by Germanic and Anglo Saxon oral tradition recounting the exploits of Beowulf the hero who gave his name to the poem Here it's transcribed as a verse epic onto which are grafted Christian additions

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  1. says:

    bum bum IN A WORLD bum bum FULL OF NASTY MONSTERS bum bum WHO EAT PEOPLE AND BREAK INTO CASTLES bum bum THE BEASTLY GRENDEL LURKED LONG OVER THE MOORES bum bum BUT NOW Cut to scene of monster ripping someone's face off with his teeth silence black screenUnknown warriors approaching Who are ye then ye armed menmailed folk that yon mighty vesselhave urged thus over the ocean wayshere o'er the waters?bum bum ONE MAN bum bum ONE LARGE MAN bum bum OF NOBLE BIRTH AND LONG LONG SWORD bum bum IS THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN SAVE THEM Hither have fared to thee far come meno'er the paths of ocean people of Geatlandand the stateliest there by his sturdy bandis Beowulf named This boon they seekthat they my master may with theehave speech at will nor spurn their prayerto give them hearing gracious HrothgarIn weeds of the warrior worthy theymethinks of our liking their leader most surelya hero that hither his henchmen has ledcue symphony BUM BUM BUUUUMMMMM BUM BUM BUUUUMMMMMBeowulf speaks To Hrothgar Iin greatness of soul would succor bringso the Wise and Brave may worst his foes if ever the end of ills is fatedof cruel contest if cure shall followand the boiling care waves cooler growelse ever afterward anguish dayshe shall suffer in sorrow while stands in placehigh on its hill that house unpeeredEveryone looks around at each other wondering what the fuck he's talking aboutExciting symphony something along the lines of O Fortuna combat shown as Beowulf tosses Grendel down gets Grendel in a headlock pokes him in his eyes Beowulf takes his shoe off and starts hitting Grendel on the top of his head with itMusic stops Shot of Beowulf on the shore hand on his hiltBeowulf speaks Tis time that I fare from you Father Almightyin grace and mercy guard you wellsafe in your seekings Seaward I go'gainst hostile warriors hold my watchBEOWULF PG 13 Parents Strongly Cautioned Contains Monsters Biting People's Faces Off Graphic Far Fetched Violence and Shots of Beowulf's Bare ChestBeowulf is totally the precursor to Conan and Rambo He's mothafuckin' badass And you know how since the Rambo movies are so old they come out in boxed sets now? Think of this slim volume as a trilogyBEOWULFBEOWULF II MOMMY DEARESTBEOWULF III BEOWULF VERSUS A BIG ASS DRAGONWhile often trilogies get worse as they go along this one actually improves And it's safe to say that a fourth sequel will never come out about Beowulf after he gets old and out of shape although that might be what BEOWULF VERSUS A BIG ASS DRAGON is If you like football Stallone Escape From New York and can't get enough of Arnold Schwarzenegger this is THE classic for you